Monday, September 24, 2012

Coincidence: No Such Thing ?

It has been a lifelong problem.
Knowing or feeling these or them before they are.
Asking for dispensations or favors and having Grandfather listen.
It is is something I shy away from.
It is not something I practice.
When it happens I always tell myself it is coincidence.
In the rationale world it must be random and coincidence.
Grandfather Raven is a clan totem. I don't belong to a clan.
My totem has always been the water bird.
Always?
Since I was 11and I killed one with an air rifle.
Something happened when I did that.
After that things changed.
Things came to me.
Projectile points were found--
A large white mate and mano--
A buffalo skull--
Animals came to me--
I could hear voices in the wind ---
I could feel the presence of things.
Dancers in the night of red and blue.
When I was a warrior I used it a lot.
I would hold things and listen to them to know of those they touched.
All I want then was to be what I was and do what I had to do.
I did that.
After some time I knew it was not a coincidence.
But when I left, I left it too.
Then Grandfather would find me.
Let me find...see...feel...and he did.
Spotted Owl feathers...stones with soul...particles of God.
Things that dropped from the sky, trees, or off the mountain.
I could climb stairs to the mesas that were invisible to others.
An Eagle would visit and and leave a thing of power for me.
The sea would call and the open space sing.
Even when I crawled into solitude, I could feel it all around.
Even when balled up in hate and anger it hovered peacefully out there waiting for me.
Just synapses firing, just coincidence, random, wouldn't that be convenient .

No comments: